True love

022413

 True Love

 I was thinking, if true love really exist - we really wouldn't need fairy tails right? Well, forget the bitterness and all that I-don't-believe in love stuff. For seven years I tried hard to self portray and express as much as I could on how to show true love.

 This is what I discovered.

 1. Love is in a form of sacrifice. Everything you do for your partner requires something from you. May it be time, resources, understanding, and even pain. There is no "I did this for you, why don't you do the same for me?!" Showbiz peeps are used to divorce coz they think their own love life's are just like the movies. But hellno, I know you would agree on this - everyone wants to have a partner who would be their last. When you love, just love. Many people love because they are "being loved back" and what happens when their partner becomes cold? Would they do the same? Again, No. You love because you love - and you are capable to do that without any help from other people or any inspirations from them (well, obviously). Despite her shortcomings or even the coldness, still love. Despite the storms inside your relationship, just love. There are never ending reasons why you should love her - I really don't have to list it down.

 Love her because she is your partner. Period

 2. Love is a decision I often go to weddings and observe especially their vows. "Till death do us part" - my favorite line and also happens to be my favorite song. Sooooo romantic and full of promises - well, they vowed for it right? However, if you vowed for such promises to your partner, how come divorce so cheap like candy nowadays? Long time relationships are now exchanged just for money - custody for it. Also, it's very easy to be unfaithful nowadays. Men and women , especially when in a cold relationship, are into other "outside" and fling relationships just to fill their emotional needs. So what happened to that "till death do us part"? I don't heard anything it say's "Ok, as long as you are loving, faithful, holding my hands, kissing me back, romantic, etc - I will be the same for you. But if you stop to be that kind of person, sorry but we have to break up" Well seriously, there are no vows like that and it's not even a vow.

 When you love a person, it's a decision. That's one of the important things I learned from my parents - you love a person because you chose it. It's your decision. For better or worse - or even to the point of being at her "worst", you must be there, still the same person loving her unconditionally. Loving is not based on emotions or even on how much sweet she is to you.

Forget the twilight effect. We are on the real world. Stories are just stories. They are destined to have good and happy endings. But you, you control your relationship.

Your own perception of "love" determines the outcome on how good or how worse your relationship will gonna be.

 3. Love is unconditional

 Well, palasak na ito. But still a very important saying for those in a relationship. Just like in the beauty and the beast, it doesnt matter how imcompatible the both of you in terms of facial distinction. What matter is what you both feel for each other right? A person who loves unconditionally doesn't need a reason for loving her partner.

For those who are curious to ask why did I let my first and seven year relationship turn into dust, here's the reason.

 Remember the three things I've just mentioned? Your relationship will die if only one person will do it. You won't really be happy if you are only the person loving sacrificially and unconditionally. No matter how hard you decided to hold on to a certain person and love her with your whole life, it's still a trash if she won't acknowledge it.

Your relationship won't survive if only one is loving truly. It takes two to tango. Relationships are for partners. Two person loving each other will all their might. Loving unconditionally. Loving without expecting. Decided to love the other till death seperates them.

 Dedicated to: Allan Felipe & His lovely girlfriend Rose

Thanks for the inspiration.
I now believe in fairy tales. lol

Why is maturity important for people in a relationship?

May 07, 2012 14:26


#1 Fact: Being in "love" will always be the best feeling in the world - next to winning a 100M Jackpot in Lotto
#2Fact: The moment you are in-"love", the heart always get the control and decision making instead of having the heart -and- mind tandem
*for a mature person, this characteristics does not apply

Why is maturity important for people in a relationship? 

I wanna quote this description of Osho of how maturity either destroys or prolong a relationship. This words pointed a gun on my face and smashed my immature stand against love relationship. Take note of the phrases in bold format.

“Immature people falling in love destroy each other’s

freedom, create a bondage, make a prison.

Mature persons in love help each other to be free; they help

each other to destroy all sorts of bondages. And when

love flows with freedom there is beauty. When love

flows with dependence there is ugliness."

You're supposed to help each other by being a lifetime partner, not a lifetime mocker. There are words we say that often hurts the feeling of our partner and most of the time it becomes the destroyer of trust between couples. Jesus Christ has the best example of love - unconditional love for His children and also willing to die for them amids their sins and hardness. There must be love- an unconditional love whose goal is to strengthen each other. Immature people think only of themselves and they're partners being like an object that can be replaced, set aside, and even throw away whenever she/he likes. Selfishness is immaturity and immaturity is ugliness inside a relationship.

"A mature person does not fall in love, he or she rises

in love. Only immature people fall; they stumble and

fall down in love. Somehow they were managing and

standing. Now they cannot manage and they cannot stand.

They were always ready to fall on the ground and to

creep. They don’t have the backbone, the spine; they

don’t have the integrity to stand alone."

A good love relationship is all about having a good foundation. What's the purpose of loving a girl and yet your not sure if she's the one? Or should we say that the girl is not that sure if she can have a lifetime with a guy like you? Standing together is the best part of love. You can prove how much they love each other by the times they fall- and yet stand together.

A mature person has the integrity to stand alone.

And when a mature person gives love, he or she gives

without any strings attached to it. When two mature

persons are in love, one of the great paradoxes of life

happens, one of the most beautiful phenomena: they are

together and yet tremendously alone. They are together

so much that they are almost one. Two mature persons in

love help each other to become more free. There is no

politics involved, no diplomacy, no effort to dominate.

Only freedom and love.”

True love has equality between partners. If one is more matured than the other, then he/she must take effort to help the other grow. The two must grow in love and respect - that would mean a growth for both of them. Both must be strong enough to cater the needs of the other and no domination should be implemented. A mature person will always try his best to help the other grow in maturity, however the other one must not take it for granted.