Arg Notes #25: Don't know. Don't care.

013113 16:30

Have you ever felt being so concerned to someone to the point of literally giving up your life just for for her/her safety? It's the "I don't care about myself attitude". The other person is more important than anything else. Your actions - even your sacrifices - is for her own good, for her own comfort. Anything you do is for the purpose of putting a smile on her face. You cry when she cries. You smile when she smiles. Her happiness is the foundation of your joy and there's no other thing that can
make you feel happy besides her.

I am so used up on taking care of people who doesn't even acknowledge my efforts for them. I feel like I've been taking for granted with all the time and the energy that for so long

I've been giving them. They're just "there" because they needed something.Needing someone to talk to or whatever. When the time comes that they are now experiencing the "I am now alright" part of life. Boom. They're gone. They don't need you anymore.

Ofcourse I am writing with a negative spirit, so don't believe or even imitate what I am writing. This is only for my "I want-to-let-it-out" time.

These days I was forced to ignore the people I used to know - the people I used to care. Maybe it's now time to seek "new" people to care about. Start with someone new - or even new friends that will know you from the start.

I know ignoring "them" will be painful. However, this is for the better of both sides.

It's your choice to forget the things we shared. You're now enjoying your so-called oasis of life. Well sarcastically, I bid you good luck. I believe in miracles, but for you, that wouldn't be necessary. Don't worry. I don't hate you. I'm just developing new "feelings" for you. Not rejection or even hatred. There will come a time where we'll meet in both ends and I wouldn't even recognize who you are.

I did my part as you're kuya, your guardian, your love one,your whatever.

You did yours.

I don't know. I don't care.

I am sorry whoever you are. It's time to say good bye and let go of everything I care about you. You have forgotten who I am and all the things I did for you. Memories cannot be erased especially for me, but I will surely erase all my remaining feelings for you.

to all the people I used to care,

I am sorry. I don't know who you are. I don't care.




DISCLAIMER:

Yeah, I do realize and understand the meaning of this post. This is soooo not me.
Get thee away from me, Satan.

Ok now he's gone.

It is really hard to forgive - that's a fact and it is humanly. However, we all commit mistakes. We fail our Master everyday. We do stupid, illogical, and selfish decisions that makes Him go *facepalm*

Loving a person is also forgiving them.

I maybe disobedient most of the times and fail you in any way I can - but still you forgive me and still at my side.

Teach me how to forgive and be patient to the people surrounding me.

Teach me how to love like You do.

Arg Notes #24: What makes you happy?

Christopher: 
Hey dad, you wanna hear something funny? There was a man who was drowning, and a boat came, and the man on the boat said "Do you need help?" and the man said "God will save me". Then another boat came and he tried to help him, but he said "God will save me", then he drowned and went to Heaven. Then the man told God, "God, why didn't you save me?" and God said "I sent you two boats, you dummy!" 

You got a dream, you gotta protect it. People can't do something themselves, they wanna tell you that you can't do it. You want something? Go get it. Period.

January 29,2013 15:56

1 hour and 3 minutes before work ends. I'm now working for past 1 year now and I find myself thinking -  am I really contented on who I am right now? Am I contented with what I am doing? or rather with my past accomplishments? Am I happy?

I am a kind of person who doesn't choose what kind of friends I'll gonna be with so believe me I have that special gift of telling who's and what's in terms of predicting people patterns on life.
Each person is has their own happiness in life. Most of them are motivated by goals and therefore reaching it, or even the slightest sense of fulfillment toward it,  are the one that makes them happy. Of course, that's reality. You wanted something because it makes you happy. You wanted it because it makes you comfortable, makes your heart tickle, or for whatever reason it makes you just happy.

Look at the people in the mall. They shop till their wallet drops. Lol. Well seriously, they are there obviously to buy something because they either needed it or they wanted it or ...they are just one of those window-shoppers who makes the mall crowded. They buy because that's what makes them happy. Girls, agree?

Then imagine you're in a car and as you go outside you step in front of a dump place with those houses structured in the in-betweens on the giant piles of trash. You can see identically dressed people - in old clothes, no foot wears, and dirt covered body. What would you feel?
And then suddenly a young boy in a seemingly beggar outfit approaches you and invited you to join him and his friends to PATINTERO.  Yikes! Is that what you would have reacted? I guess not. Hunger-stricken people takes a minimum effort to be happy. They can be happy at a minimal cost and amids the hunger - they will find a reason to be happy. They are alive. One available meal per day. One steady roof for the house. - Yes, this makes them happy.

I usually react on the hardships of life as if I was the poorest and "Pinakamalas na tao" in earth. MALAS means "bad luck". Pinaka means "the most".
I take for granted what God has given to me and forget how blessed I'm to be covered by His blood and eternal protection.. Most Christians neglects God's promises - and that makes them unhappy.

We Christians are destined for an eternal purpose and therefore we must find joy on eternal things. The problem is, WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY?
If you put happiness on earthly things - money , fame , friends , popularity, etc , do you think you would be satisfied? Yes, but only for a short period of time.
That's why many people, especially Christians, are not happy and even contented in their life.
Why? Because of their source of happiness. If you will only look on the cross, ask Jesus "What would you want me to do?", then expect true happiness.

Life is a test on how faithful servant you are. Life is journey, a race where you are tested on how fast you are to obey and fulfill God's will for your life.

God wants you to be happy and He wants you to experience the best life.
But remember, true happiness is found inside God's will. You cannot find contentment and be truly happy if you are living outside God's will.

Don't lose hope on life or neither get tired of it. God is there beside you and He wanted you to go for it!

Arg Notes #23: Reminiscing Jelai

Contact: IEE LEI
TEL:+639064720569
Date:11.09.2008
04:47:16

"joshua"
Lam mO: mbait ka
Sna: wg u mgbgo
Bkt: prang my ngbgo sau?
E1 q b: bsta un na un
Ikw Lng: ung ta0ng nkpg pa open sakn
Svhn m0 nga: ng lala c lala
Slmat dhl: ur always der kht bz u
Ok lng b kng: 2l0y ung sa friday
Pwd: pgwa ng assgnment?
PengE aqng: p0em/s0ng n gwa u
Dhl xau: mdmi aku narealze

Pki sguTn nMn,antayin q txt m0h,tnx..

The text message above was from way back 2008. College days! Good thing I was able to save some.

History repeats itself - and so thus friendships. I was fond of keeping things important to me, especially messages and keepsakes. The girl from the text message above was not my college girlfriend nor a fling - she was my only girl best friend during those years. We share laughs , secrets, and some mushy talks about our love "lives". She was one of the girls who saw me transparently beyond my looks and weird attitude. Thank God for this special person. She was definitely one of the persons you would want to spend a lifetime friendship with.

Love Notes #7: I DO

DAY 7: I do cherish you for the rest of my life .You don't have to think twice

Old school days. This line was from the famous hit by  98 degrees, I DO. Amazing voice renditions and emotionally inclined lyrics - definitely this was a cupid's arrow to everyone.

I remember as a child, I was very fond of attending different weddings. Sweet isn't it? The mixed emotions around the crowd to the patiently waiting groom and the bride, weddings are truly the best scene to watch.

...and then the famous line by the acting minister, "Do you accept this man to be your husband?........la la la la la la "

Then the girl grins a sweet smile and romantically say "I do".

I imagine myself being asked by the minister if I really "do" love my partner - of course I'll say I do!
I do cherish her, and when I cherish her, it means unending care and support. For me that's what real love is. You must do what's best for your partner. Cherishing her being the most important woman in your life (well, next to your mother of course).

I love you, though sometimes I forgot to mean it and show in anyway I can. You light up my world. I cherish you more than gold and silver - and I PHONE  & S3's.

You're important to me. Believe me. I will treasure you till the last of my days.

Arg Notes #22: Love at first sight

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Love at first sight. Remember the first time you saw your crush?

Yes, that "butterfly" feeling you felt with matching cold drops of water on your back?

No, it's not that thing.

I'm almost on my mid 20's and I consider myself picky when in terms of "admiring" women. Well, it really depends on the person in charge on his standard body-character-personality test on a girl he is starting to like. We, guys, have our own checklist. You must accept that fact. It's rare find for a girl to be both beautiful with good personality or either one with a cute smile and a hot body.

In reality, they have their own characteristics that makes them unique. Each of them is beautiful on God's eyes. Loving is in fact a comlex feeling. As explained by the majority, " It makes life worthwhile". The worst case scenario is - you don't know if you're in love or maybe you're just flattered to the extreme level. I don't know if I will start to believe in love at first sight but believe me when I saw this girl, I was really strucked hard like one of those blow of Marquez.

Arg Notes #21: Uchiha Sasuke

01 22 2013

People change because they wanted to. It's choice. Every decisions has its own outcome.
Good or bad. No matter how crazy it is, we do have end results. A person cannot stop changing either for the better or for the worst. I remember an anime character named Sasuke from the clan of Uchiha. He experienced his clan being slaughtered by his older brother Itachi. Being a child, he was consumed by guilt and revenge.

I know we are living in a world where we are taught to forgive and to forget - but there are some things that can't be easily erased by a mere sorry right?

Anger changes a person no matter how good it is. An unforgiving spirit is like a cursed seal inflicted upon you and there's no way you can get away with it.

Anger will change your destiny.
Rage will destroy it.

You have the option whether to fight for your future or let anger change you.

Sasuke Uchiha: [Flashback] My name is Sasuke Uchiha. I hate a lot of things and I don't particularly like anything. What I have is not a dream, because I will make it a reality. I'm going to restore my clan and destroy a certain somebody. And noe I finally arrived. 

"If you think I'm just a foolish kid ruled by his emotions, that's fine. Following Itachi's path would have been too childish, the whispering of fools who don't know hatred. If anyone else tries to ridicule the way I live, I'll slaughter everyone they ever cared about. And then maybe they'll understand what it's like to taste... a little of my hatred."

"Naruto... it's too late, nothing you can say will change me! I'm going to kill you and every last person in your beloved village! It's time to make your choice! Kill me and become a hero, or die at my hand and become another one of my victims!"

I have long since closed my eyes... My only goal is in the darkness."

Arg Notes #20: Kim Chiu

Just a random photo collage of Kim Chiu. To be honest, I'm a big fan of this girl. Though she looked like a friend very familiar to me,  she still possessed a rare beauty - or should we say a cuteness you can't find on a regular girl.

Kimberly Sue Yap Chiu or Kim Chiu (born April 19, 1990) was born in Tacloban,Leyte and later transfered to Cebu City. She is a Filipino actress and model. Chiu first appeared on a reality TV show, Pinoy Big Brother: Teen Edition last April, 2006 and won the competition garnering more than 600,000 votes. She and third placer Gerald Anderson, with whom she had a very close friendship during her stay in the House, eventually entered showbiz and was made as a love team. Their love team was called Kimerald, a combination of their names’ Kim and Gerald, by their fans. Both were given recognition and appeared on several programs on ABS-CBN and were given endorsements. Chiu starred in her first movie, First Day High and eventually given their first solo movie, still with Anderson, I’ve Fallen for You. Chiu and Anderson starred in their very first television series Sana Maulit Muli which was shown also in Taiwan entitled Chances and was dubbed in Mandarin and will also be shown in Cambodia.
source


I wanna promote this site. Best photo collage! :)
http://www.getloupe.com/

Thanks Vincent! - http://veenix.blogspot.jp/

Sample Post

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Loves to blame

Loves To Blame

Time in Time I thought through it all
How we loved and loved
and how we fought each other
pushing one another
to be somebody else
and time in time for the rest of my thoughts
I certain if the end was right or wrong
and wether we so should be together with somebody else
a lost memory

she had water in her eyes
she cried stay with me
say how can this be loved
if you are leaving me
but darling love's to blame

and i can't see you right now
'cause my heart just can't take it
can't be near you right now
'cause i know you're no longer mine
I can't see you

it makes me ache that we had to break
even though i knew your heart so well
we're strangers in different places
thought we're livin mile apart
my best friends got my world as being soft
we'll never share a name of her be promed
but i will always remember the years we've spent in love


I still think of you
I pray that you were save
I'm still missing you
but it has to be this weakest
I'm not right for you
and that's why love's to blame




and i can't see you right now
'cause my heart just can't take it
can't be near you right now
'cause i know you're no longer mine
I can't see you right know
'cause my heart just can't fake it
can't be near you rigth now
cause I know you're no longer mine

and I can't see you
oh i can't see you
I just can't see you right now

But maybe time will heal the hearts
and maybe after time you'll understand
I take the darker side of me

and i can't see you right now
'cause my heart just can't take it
can't be near you right now
'cause i know you're no longer mine
and I can't see you right know
'cause my heart just can't fake it
can't be near you rigth now
cause I know you're no longer mine

and i can't see you
no, i can't see you
i just can't see you rigth now

no i can't see you
i just can't see you

i just can't see you right know
and love's to blame

Arg Notes #19 : There she goes..again

It's been nine months. Bitter months. I started this - I have to end this. It's a war between me and myself. My goals and disappointments seems to be raging me into a battle I was never meant to win.
Look at her. She's happy. Contented with the world she chose. I really underestimated the power of Satan for bringing backsliders into the fake oasis of life. I knew the reality, but I was here lurking in the shadows of my mess. What on earth God is trying to prove to me?! -that He is in control. For years I was been on a tug-of-war against my parents, trying to prove how much I love that person. I even resisted the voice in me telling she was the one! My heart remained loyal to her even when grief is too much to bare.

Yet, I was really disappointed - to the fact that I was now afraid of giving out my best for a person deserving my whole heart. You can love her with your whole heart, be faithful, and even take your efforts farther than the stars - but in the end, she'll just TAKE YOU FOR GRANTED.

Arg Notes #18: New Year, New life?

January 17, 2013

And now it's a new year. I really don't know how to start this year right - to the point of buying a Starbucks planner for me to be motivated on making Godly plans for my year. Honestly, I've been living a life way below my potential. I should have been a change person by now, but look at me, I'm full of regrets . However, this is a mistake that only faith can re-compensate. Without Him, I will be nothing but a looser. A person so mocked up by the world and is living in the past.

So I welcome 2013!

I promise to change the theme of this blog. No more bitterness. I'll do my best to make this encouraging and worth reading for. God saved me for a purpose and thus I should live a life worthy of praise.

"You can get everything in life you want if you will just help enough other people get what they want." — Zig Ziglar 

"Others can stop you temporarily - you are the only one who can do it permanently." — Zig Ziglar 

"Success is the maximum utilization of the ability that you have." — Zig Ziglar 

"You cannot climb the ladder of success dressed in the costume of failure." — Zig Ziglar 

"You are the only person on earth who can use your ability." — Zig Ziglar 

"Go as far as you can see and when you get there, you will always be able to see farther." — Zig Ziglar 

"You were born to win, but to be a winner, you must plan to win, prepare to win, and expect to win." — Zig Ziglar 

"Success means doing the best we can with what we have. Success is the doing, not the getting; in the trying, not the triumph. Success is a personal standard, reaching for the highest that is in us, becoming all that we can be." — Zig Ziglar